Lamest Way For Lord Voldemort To Die
by silvermist 91
Summary: What the title says, a humouress one-shot


Lamest Way For Lord Voldemort To Die, and Embarrassing Moments By Silvermist91, and with the help of ENSIGN and my friend, Christie. Summary: What the title says.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, but I do wish I did  
  
Silvermist91: OK,OK, I know, I haven't been updating in a long time so here's a little one-shot thing. I apologize to inu-hanyou17 and everyone else but, my story Secret Revealed is currently on hold...so let the list begin...  
  
This story is dedicated to Dark lil Hiei, RavenClawPrefect, and mainly my friend Catherine Mchenry who's birthday's tomorrow...HAPPY BIRTHDAY  
  
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He chokes on a grape!  
  
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While speaking to Nagini, Lord Voldemort accidentally chokes on his own tongue.  
  
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Gilderoy Lockhart killed him...  
  
...  
  
...  
  
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Neville Longbottom killed him...  
  
...  
  
...  
  
...  
  
...period.  
  
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While preparing to cast the strongest explosive spell in the century towards Harry, by coincidence a bird happened to fly right in front of the wand the moment the spell was cast. (A.N. *BOOM*)  
  
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Voldemort was killed by a chocolate cake... a poisoned chocolate cake. (A.N. Sweet Death)  
  
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Raising his wand to cast the final spell to rid the world of The-Boy-Who- Lived, Voldemort was struck by lightning.  
  
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Annoyed and depressed by the incompetents Deatheater and constant failure to kill The-Boy-Who-Just-Wouldn't-Freaking-Die, Voldemort commit suicide.  
  
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Laughing wickedly at the limp form of the barely alive Harry Potter, Voldemort cast the killing curse...sadly he was holding his wand the wrong way round.  
  
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Casting the killing curse with Ron's second year wand.  
  
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Mysteriously out of nowhere an anvil with a big 'Acme' sign on it fell on top of Voldemort, thus killing him. (Thank the Warner Brother)  
  
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Voldemort died from a heart attack from one of his Deatheater apparating in front of him.  
  
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Voldemort died from old age. *AWWWWW, no immortality*  
  
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While trying to summon Godric Gryfiddor's sword to his hand, harry accidentally misdirect it, and it stabbed Voldemort in the back.  
  
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"Wormtail, bring me the dagger," said Voldemort staring hungrily at the bounded Harry. "Yes, master," Wormtail replied, walking towards him, dagger held in his palm...sadly he tripped, he felled and stabbed Voldemort in the heart.  
  
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"OOOOOOOOOOHHHhhhhhhh... what does this button do???"  
  
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He tripped...he fell..and froze to death. (*Hint*Hint* Winter= freezing cold lake. A.N. if any of you who read closely in hp, gof you'd noticed that the Hogwarts Lake wasn't frozen, cause it said that victor krum had to jump into it to listen to the golden egg)  
  
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Harry strangled him to death. (What no magic?)  
  
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Attempting to become an animangus...for the first time, Voldemort accidentally bit himself while in his animangus form...a black mamba.  
  
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He was killed by a basilisk.  
  
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He became mentally insane *though he already is one* after listening to Barney's 'I love you' song over and over again *Shudder* the horror.  
  
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He was stabbed in the foot and got gangrene.  
  
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Screams of terror and fear echoed through Diagon Alley as Voldemort and his group of Deatheater stomped the area. Walking menacingly down the path, he tripped over the invisible book of invisibility, completely losing the evil effect of his presence.  
  
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Casting one of the strongest protective spell, this prevents any spell from passing through, Voldemort laughed out loud. "You fool, you can't possibly stop me" Harry casually flicked his wand and a pile of snow fell atop Voldermort.  
  
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Casting one of the strongest protective spell, which prevents any spell from passing through, Voldemort laughed out loud. "You fool, you can't possibly stop me" Harry casually dug through his bag a fished out a grenade and flung it towards Voldemort. "Finite Incantatem, Finite Incantatem, Finite Incantatem, Finite Incantatem, Finite Incantatem" Voldermort yelled over and over. *tick*...*tick*...*tick*...*BOOM*  
  
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Voldermort: You know you didn't have to over do it, now  
I'll be the laughing stock of the century.  
Silvermist91: But, but, but part of what I said was  
rather true you know, remember.  
Voldermort: Oh shut up, can't you give a guy some dignity...  
Ensign: (mumbling to Silvermist91) OH MY GOD, he's a  
GUY!!!  
Silvermist91: SHHHH... he'll hear you!  
Ensign: But, but, he's a GUY!!!  
Voldermort : ...just because I died by slipping on that  
banana peel doesn't mean you can rub it in my face. OOHHHhh  
the utter humiliation.  
Silvermist91: You forgotto mention about crashing into  
the Gryfindor table, right after that...  
Ensign: ...and slipping again because of the pumpkin  
juice.  
Silvermist91: Oh!Oh, and remember to add the part where...  
Voldermort: *GROWL* OK...  
Silvermist91: ...his wand kept on slipping out off his  
hand, because it was covered in grease...  
Voldermort: OK...you can stop it now.  
Ensign: ...and this was done in front of everybody in  
Hogwarts and...  
Silvermist91: ...I think your Deatheaters...  
Voldermort: ENOUGH!!! OK, I GET IT ALREADY. I know I died a  
horrible lame death, but do you really have to tell  
everyone about it...just wait till I get my hands on that  
Longbottom's neck...  
Ensign: ..Errr, you can't, you're dead.  
Voldermort: ...Oh shut it, I'll rip him to pieces and stuff  
it all up his *please fill in the nasty threats*...he  
could've dropped that banana peel somewhere else...but  
nooooooo, it had to be right in front of the great hall  
entrance. It just happened, HAPPENED to be exactly where I  
was just about to step.  
Silvermist91: OK, he's going into hyperactive mode,  
anyway please review and goodbye.  
  
(A.N. anybody out there with any more ideas that they would like me to post, please email me at Krystaltan864@hotmail.com)  
  
5th May, 2004  
  
Doesn't that button look pretty, please click it? *Anime Eyes* 


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